Sunday, August 06, 2006

Why Does He Make Me Feel This Way?

Well, it's almost two in the morning and it is still a humid, balmy 82 degrees outside. Uuugh. I had to work several hours this evening and wished I hadn't gone into a certain store. I have a guy friend that I used to be really close to and he works in this store. I'll call him Randall. I saw Randall with his new girlfriend. He walked her around the whole entire store as she did her "light" shopping. My stomach was hurting. He barely said hi to me. I hate feeling this way. It's pathetic, I know. I just can't help it. What happened to us? Why has he totally dissed me? I am not even competition for that girl. I just don't get it. A mutual friend of mine (Huey) tried to explain it to me, but he couldn't come up with any substantial reasons other than his focus is elsewhere. How true. It still makes me feel bad. I couldn't even look at him. I wanted to just go in a corner, hide, and cry like the idiot I am. The last encounter I had with him on the phone wasn't very good. Here is how the call went.

"Hey Randall, how's it going?"

He says, "What do you need?"

I am serious. That is exactly what he said to me. I had not spoken to him in over a week and his response to me is "What do you need?"

That is why I feel so bad. When he asked me that I just told him that I was only calling to see how he was doing and that I would just go ahead and let him go. I then hung up the phone and died inside. It's not right for him to treat me like this. We used to be so close and now it's like I don't even know him anymore.

Oh!!! I am done rambling, as I have now managed to get discouraged once again. As I read this post, I am half-tempted to delete it. It's so frustrating to read about how overly dramatic I am probably acting about the situation. Reality check, I guess.

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